


Doomfist doesn't like that

by AL_Alexander



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, Other, Violence, all the ones above are heavily implied, and humor, and stupid stream shit, this is just fucking crack, vague mentions of relationships, vague mentions of violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 09:21:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11437866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AL_Alexander/pseuds/AL_Alexander
Summary: I had a stupid idea from a post on Tumblr I was looking at while watching a friend's stream. This included saying that you shouldn't have Akande having wrestled with a lion bare handed. I found that so funny, and I need Doomfist to be a sarcastic asshole. That's basically what happened.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I am literally the first person to write in Ao3 for this ship. THE FIRST ONE. Even worse: only one other person I've met ships this. ONE. I AM THE FIRST TO SHIP THIS WTF. Guess I'm going to just live out my life as a Reapfist76 hermit.

The mission itself had been simple and was quickly over. Widow hadn’t felt well, which Akande decided was best. Reaper and Sombra were more than able. They’d lost a few soldiers, which Akande would have their funerals soon. He was walking towards his office, Reaper and Sombra gossiping like school girls a little ways away, and the remaining grunts behind.

“I heard that he’s super uncivilized.”

Akande turned, looking at the grunts. They were silent. He looked back forward and continued moving.

“I heard his family wasn’t as wealthy as they say.”

He threw a confused look to Reaper and Sombra, who’s eyebrows were raised (at least, Sombra’s were). Reaper pointed to the grunts before shrugging. From the group, but no one was sure. He nodded and did a small head tilt to the grunts, telling them to pay attention. They nodded.

“I also heard that he had to blow off his master to get his position.”

He whirled around to the group and glared at them. He glanced at Reaper, who quickly signed, “third row back, sixth from your left.” Akande gave a short nod, barely noticeable, before walking towards that grunt. The others parted around him. The grunt looked amazed and awed and terrified as he stopped in front of him. He looked him dead in the eyes as he said,

“We also have to fight lions with our bare hands in order to prove ourselves worthy enough to survive to adulthood.”

He heard Reaper and Sombra start laughing.

The grunt grinned and started to go, “I knew it!” It was cut off as Doomfist punched him in the nuts…

...with his robotic hand.

The grunt’s hips exploded in a rain of bone, muscle, and viscera in general. He screamed and fell to the ground. Sombra had stopped laughing, but Reaper was apparently crying, doubled over, unable to breathe. Akande looked down at the man before kneeling and softly going,

“And I guess what I heard about you being an asshole was true.”

With that, he stood and walked away to his office.


	2. Chapter 2

Gabe was still sobbing from laughter as he called up Jack. “What is it, Gabe, it’s 3 in the morning?” Jack answered groggily. “Doomfist just fucking exploded some asshole’s hips!”

“What…?”

Gabe recounted the tale, and was met with silence. “Jack, you still there?”

“... I may have to join Talon,” came the thoughtful grunt on the other side. Gabe grinned. “Can’t wait to see you here, white boy.”

“Mhm… Love you, Gabe.”

“Love you, Jackie.”

“... before I go, does that mean we both can fuck Doomfist?”

“Of fucking course.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please understand, this is all for shits and giggles.


End file.
